Relationship Principle #7: THE GREATEST ARE THE SERVANTS.
With this last relationship principle, I want us to look at this verse in our Bibles together to get a sense of what Jesus has to teach us about one of the greatest decisions you and I could ever make to build some of the greatest relationships that you’d ever dream possible. Whether it’s a relationship with a husband or wife or our kids or one of our friends or a Christian that we’re ministering with, somebody we go to school with, this is Jesus’ advice about how to build the greatest relationships.
It came from a couple of His disciples arguing about relationships and being angry about what was, in the disciples’ hearts, a real desire for greatness. They desired to be great and do great things.
Mark 10:42-45 (ESV) says, “And Jesus called them to him and said to them, "You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Every single day of my life, every single day of your life, we face this simple test of greatness. Exalt yourself. OR Humble yourself. It’s the simplest test of greatness. Jesus said that the way the world thinks about this test of greatness is all turned upside down from the way he wants you to think about this test of greatness. In every relationship of our lives we face this simple test: exalt yourself/humble yourself. What will it be. It can’t be both. Exalt yourself or humble yourself.
This last great relationship principle of Jesus is all about how to be great at being humble. The question is, how can we get great at being humble? This is a huge question. I think a lot of people think they don’t go together. But Jesus lays it out for us in Matthew 23:11-12 (ESV).
Once more the disciples are clamoring about who’s going to be the greatest when they all get to heaven – who’s going to be closest to Jesus when we get to heaven. Jesus says, “The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.”
Folks, HUMILITY IS A SIGN THAT YOU really know God. Because when you really know God, you don’t need the attention. You don’t need to be the center. You want God to get the glory. You want God’s name to be lifted up. This is so key. Jesus really wants us to get this. So He told His disciples and He tells us…
DON’T be like the Pharisees: In Matthew 23:5-6 (ESV) Jesus say this – “They (the Pharaisees) do all their deeds to be seen by others. For they make their phylacteries broad and their fringes long, and they love the place of honor at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues.”
There’s some guys who needed some notice. Everything they did, Jesus said, was for men to see. They’d become people, even religiously who every action of their life was for notice. Then He gave a list of three things they did. They made their phylacteries wide, they loved the places of honor at banquets, and they loved to have men call them rabbi. It’s a pretty good list of the ways that we try to get notice even today.
“Their phylacteries wide”. What is a phylactery? It sounds like one of those dinosaurs in Jurassic Park. A phylactery was a box with scripture in it. They would carry this around with them all the time. The wider you made it meant the more scriptures you were trying to memorize and put into your life. The fact that this exhibited a need for notice is seen in the fact that these phylacteries, you didn’t put them in your pocket, under your prayer robe.
You wore these phylacteries on your forehead so that everybody could see. That’s a need for notice, I think! This is the love of symbols. This is the love of things that people can look at and say, “Wow! They’ve got it together!” We look at these Pharisees and think they wore these phylacteries on their foreheads, how silly!
Yet if you think it through, we try to impress people with some pretty silly symbols, don’t we? Don’t get me wrong. God doesn’t care about the make of car that you drive. Or what logo might be on your clothes. You don’t have to drive a Hyundai to be holy. But God does care about WHY you drive the make if car that you drive. God does care about WHY you wear the kind of clothes that you wear. He does care about why you live where you live and if the whole reason is because you want people to see and be impressed, that’s like being a Pharisee. Jesus said watch out for this attitude in your lives.
“They love the places of honor at banquets”. Not only do they have the love of symbols but they also had a love of recognition. Nothing will destroy relationships more quickly than one in the relationship who has to have all the recognition. He said, “They love to have men call them rabbi”. That’s the love of titles. They loved to have Doctor or Rabbi or whatever after their name. One of the things I like about COV is it’s a church without titles. We don’t have the Holy Right Reverend Mike around here. It’s just Pastor Mike or even just Mike.
Folks, here’s the point - You exalt yourself when you need others’ notice. The alternative is you humble yourself – you notice others’ needs. You’re looking around and you see other people and you see the needs in their life and you begin to take more and more delight in meeting those needs.
Put these relationship principles of Jesus into practice. I love you guys. Stay faithful. Stay the course. ENDURE!
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