BACKGROUND:
We all make many mistakes or slip up when we are off guard. We all stumble, but our most frequent failures occur when we are speaking. Because we are prone to make mistakes in our speech, we need to be even more careful to let God control what we say.
Many people may think that it is impossible to control their tongues, but most people haven’t even begun to try. The ability to control the tongue is the mark of true maturity for the Christian. When Jesus confronted the religious leaders about their accusations against him, he said that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks—showing that what is inside of a person affects what they do with their speech (Matthew 12:33-37).
He also said that we must give account for every careless word we utter (Matthew 12:36). People who can control their tongues will be able to control themselves in every other way. The wisdom and love from God and the self-restraint given by the Holy Spirit will help us exercise this control. (Proverbs 15:1-4)
Bit . . . Rudder . . . Tongue . . . Spark. What do these things have in common? They are all small but very effective controllers—they each direct something much larger than themselves. James is building a case for the damaging power of our words. We see this evidenced in history when dictators such as Adolph Hitler, the Ayatollah Khomeini, Joseph Stalin, and Saddam Hussein used their words to mobilize people to destroy others. We see it evidenced in church splits and in the ruining of a pastor’s reputation. And we see how verbal abuse in the home can destroy the very personhood and character of spouses and children.
Satan uses the tongue to divide people and pit them against one another. Idle words are damaging because they quickly spread destruction. We dare not be careless with our words, thinking that we can apologize later, because even when we do, the damage remains. A few words spoken in anger can destroy a relationship that took years to build. Remember that words are like fire; they can neither control nor reverse the damage they do.
The tongue is full of wickedness because of the damage it can cause in the world and bring to the rest of the Christian community. The uncontrolled tongue can turn one’s life into a blazing flame of destruction. This means that the tongue can destroy all the good that we’ve built up over a lifetime. While we have ministered for years and years and seen abundant fruit, if we fail to control the tongue, we can undo all the good we have built up in our years of ministry. Our speech has a power that few other capabilities possess, for our tongue can be set on fire by hell itself.
SO WHAT? (what will I do with what I have read today?)
The average American has 30 conversations a day and you'll spend 1/5 of your life talking. In one year your conversations will fill 66 books of 800 pages a book. If you're a man you speak an average of 20,000 words a day. If you're a woman you speak 30,000 words a day. (Like the guy who was asked, "Do you resent that your wife has the last word?" He replied, "No, I'm just glad when she finally gets to it!"
Some of us are born with a silver foot in our mouths. We have this natural ability to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Nothing is opened more wrongly at the wrong time than our mouths. (Like the stock boy at the grocery store. Lady asked him, "Can I buy half a head of lettuce?" He walked back to the manager to ask, not realizing she was walking right behind him. He said, "You're not going to believe this, there's an old bag out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce." He turned around and saw her standing there and said, "And this fine lady would like to buy the other half.")
Our mouths get us into a lot of trouble. James talks more about the tongue than anybody else in the New Testament. Every chapter in the book of James says something about managing your mouth. "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check." James says, if you can control your mouth, you're perfect. He's not talking about sinless.
Some of us are born with a silver foot in our mouths. We have this natural ability to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Nothing is opened more wrongly at the wrong time than our mouths. (Like the stock boy at the grocery store. Lady asked him, "Can I buy half a head of lettuce?" He walked back to the manager to ask, not realizing she was walking right behind him. He said, "You're not going to believe this, there's an old bag out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce." He turned around and saw her standing there and said, "And this fine lady would like to buy the other half.")
Our mouths get us into a lot of trouble. James talks more about the tongue than anybody else in the New Testament. Every chapter in the book of James says something about managing your mouth. "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check." James says, if you can control your mouth, you're perfect. He's not talking about sinless.
The word "perfection" in Greek literally means "mature, healthy". When you go to the doctor and say, “I'm not feeling well,” the first thing he says is, "Stick out your tongue." Your tongue reveals what's going on inside of you, not just physically but spiritually. James says that you've got to learn to manage your mouth. You've got to learn to tame your tongue. You've got to get your tongue under control.
WHY MUST I WATCH WHAT I SAY?
"Why must I do that? It's only words; I'm just kidding." “Words are significant”, says James. Two reasons we have to learn to manage our mouth from verses 2-6.
#1. MY TONGUE DIRECTS WHERE I GO
It has tremendous influence and control over my life. Where are you headed in life? Where are you going to be ten years from now? Look at your conversation. What do you like to talk about? What do you talk about the most? We shape our words and then our words shape us. James says, “The tongue is small, it's tiny”. And because it's tiny we think it's insignificant. But it has tremendous power. v. 3 Consider a bit in a horse's mouth. You've got a huge stallion, 2,000-3,000 pounds, and a 95 pound jockey on his back. The jockey can control the tremendous mighty horse by a little piece of metal stuck strategically over his tongue. Likewise your tongue controls the direction of your life wherever you want to go, and a little bit of a word or a phrase can influence the total direction of your life.
Then he says, “Consider a ship”. The Queen Mary has 3 acres of recreational space. The anchor is equal to the weight of ten cars. Yet a relatively small rudder directs the huge oceanliner out in the middle of the waves and winds and seas. A little rudder keeps it on course. Our tongue is like that. Our tongue is like a rudder that steers us. Ships: "... they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go." My tongue directs where I go. Your tongue is the steering wheel of your life. It is the guidance system. If you don't like the way you're headed right now, change the way you talk.
#2. MY TONGUE CAN DESTROY WHAT I HAVE
In v. 5 James gives another illustration. Imagine a beautiful forest -- tall beautiful trees everywhere. Now imagine it in one minute up in smoke, completely destroyed instantly with a little tiny match. It only takes a spark to get a fire going. In 1983 in Australia, one fire overnight destroyed 600 miles of land, villages, livestock. All from a single match. James says that your tongue can destroy like that. You can lose it all. A careless camper can destroy an entire national forest overnight. A careless word can destroy a life overnight. Thousands of lives. Gossip is like fire. It spreads quickly and it wrecks havoc. I wonder how many people because of a careless word have destroyed their marriage, or their career, or their reputation, or the reputation of another, or their church, or a friendship. The tongue not only has the power to direct where you go but also to destroy what you have if you don't learn to control it. It's like a fire.
Have you ever met a verbal arsonist? Their words are always inflammatory. James says that words, like a fire, can burn people. Proverbs 18:20 (GN) says, "You have to live with the consequences of everything you say."
vs. 6 "... it sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." He's saying here that words can create a chain reaction. You can say something that you didn't mean to have any harm, but it can have devastating effects that are beyond your control. Just a few inflammatory statements set off a chain of events that we now look back on and call World War II. On a more personal level, you come home from work and you're tired and grumpy and cranky. The husband walks in and yells at the wife. The wife yells at the oldest kid. The oldest kid yells at the baby sister. The baby sister goes out and kicks the dog. The dog goes and bites the cat. The cat comes in and scratches the baby. The baby bites the head off the Barbie doll. Wouldn't it be a whole lot simpler if the husband just bit off the head of the Barbie doll himself? Chain reaction, the course of hell.
"Set on fire by hell" itself. A couple comes in for marriage counseling. "I said this and then she said that, then I said this..." Then what happened? "All hell broke loose". Our words can cause "all hell to break loose." James says you've got to learn to manage your mouth, not only because it can direct where you go but it can destroy what you have. You can loose your family, your kids, your career simply by what you say. It's like a fire.
Proverbs 21:23 says, "If you want to stay out of trouble be careful what you say!"
WHY MUST I WATCH WHAT I SAY?
"Why must I do that? It's only words; I'm just kidding." “Words are significant”, says James. Two reasons we have to learn to manage our mouth from verses 2-6.
#1. MY TONGUE DIRECTS WHERE I GO
It has tremendous influence and control over my life. Where are you headed in life? Where are you going to be ten years from now? Look at your conversation. What do you like to talk about? What do you talk about the most? We shape our words and then our words shape us. James says, “The tongue is small, it's tiny”. And because it's tiny we think it's insignificant. But it has tremendous power. v. 3 Consider a bit in a horse's mouth. You've got a huge stallion, 2,000-3,000 pounds, and a 95 pound jockey on his back. The jockey can control the tremendous mighty horse by a little piece of metal stuck strategically over his tongue. Likewise your tongue controls the direction of your life wherever you want to go, and a little bit of a word or a phrase can influence the total direction of your life.
Then he says, “Consider a ship”. The Queen Mary has 3 acres of recreational space. The anchor is equal to the weight of ten cars. Yet a relatively small rudder directs the huge oceanliner out in the middle of the waves and winds and seas. A little rudder keeps it on course. Our tongue is like that. Our tongue is like a rudder that steers us. Ships: "... they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go." My tongue directs where I go. Your tongue is the steering wheel of your life. It is the guidance system. If you don't like the way you're headed right now, change the way you talk.
#2. MY TONGUE CAN DESTROY WHAT I HAVE
In v. 5 James gives another illustration. Imagine a beautiful forest -- tall beautiful trees everywhere. Now imagine it in one minute up in smoke, completely destroyed instantly with a little tiny match. It only takes a spark to get a fire going. In 1983 in Australia, one fire overnight destroyed 600 miles of land, villages, livestock. All from a single match. James says that your tongue can destroy like that. You can lose it all. A careless camper can destroy an entire national forest overnight. A careless word can destroy a life overnight. Thousands of lives. Gossip is like fire. It spreads quickly and it wrecks havoc. I wonder how many people because of a careless word have destroyed their marriage, or their career, or their reputation, or the reputation of another, or their church, or a friendship. The tongue not only has the power to direct where you go but also to destroy what you have if you don't learn to control it. It's like a fire.
Have you ever met a verbal arsonist? Their words are always inflammatory. James says that words, like a fire, can burn people. Proverbs 18:20 (GN) says, "You have to live with the consequences of everything you say."
vs. 6 "... it sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." He's saying here that words can create a chain reaction. You can say something that you didn't mean to have any harm, but it can have devastating effects that are beyond your control. Just a few inflammatory statements set off a chain of events that we now look back on and call World War II. On a more personal level, you come home from work and you're tired and grumpy and cranky. The husband walks in and yells at the wife. The wife yells at the oldest kid. The oldest kid yells at the baby sister. The baby sister goes out and kicks the dog. The dog goes and bites the cat. The cat comes in and scratches the baby. The baby bites the head off the Barbie doll. Wouldn't it be a whole lot simpler if the husband just bit off the head of the Barbie doll himself? Chain reaction, the course of hell.
"Set on fire by hell" itself. A couple comes in for marriage counseling. "I said this and then she said that, then I said this..." Then what happened? "All hell broke loose". Our words can cause "all hell to break loose." James says you've got to learn to manage your mouth, not only because it can direct where you go but it can destroy what you have. You can loose your family, your kids, your career simply by what you say. It's like a fire.
Proverbs 21:23 says, "If you want to stay out of trouble be careful what you say!"
Ask God for help this morning in this area of life. Read Ephesians 4:29.
I love you guys. Stay faithful. Stay the course.
What has seemed to work for me is to take 2-5 sec. or even longer depending on the significance of my words. A short pause can make your conversations meaningful. This also gives you a chance to listen.
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